play a song for me [02 Sep 2009|09:44pm] [ mood | weird ] i am getting far along in the editing of my book. i still need to finish much of the addenda, and i may write another scene or three. i think i should be able to finish it this semester. i am excited about my term paper for my being human class. my teacher seemed excited about my idea, and i have started to outline it. this is good practice for the novel i am gestating. it is exciting because i have always found the idea of writing something and then expanding it into something much larger and more profound to be romantic, but i have never been able to do it. my writing process doesn't allow for a great deal of expansion. i feel like i am getting better, most of the time. but i also kind of feel like i have fallen back into shock or denial. i find myself numb when i actually think about it, and i've got this constant feeling like i'm not doing something really important, even though i am caught up on all the important stuff. it is ten o'clock. i have work in twelve hours. i'm not sure what the fuck i am doing, but i think that may be okay. it kind of has to be. my brain isn't working the way it did just six months ago. perhaps it is about grooves and settling, not about plotting your own course.

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