play a song for me no more rain, no more roses [22 Aug 2009|10:19am] [ mood | awake ] work in an hour and a half. yay. it is nice to be doing things again, to have expectations and responsibilities. it feels good to be back among the living. but i still feel dead. i can change the things i do, but i do not know how to change how i feel. it's like i got on BART and fell asleep, and now instead of being where i need to be, i am somewhere in the east bay, scratching my head. it is going to take too long to get back to my car, and i just kind of want to leave. but what, am i just never going to go home again? that would be nice. i wanna walk away, start all over again.

play a song for me i ain't sayin' i'm innocent - in fact the reverse [22 Aug 2009|09:18pm] [ mood | numb ] i think my father and my's relationship may finally have been broken. i don't know if that makes me happy or sad. i am going to go get stoned and try not to think about everything in my life i hate and how much i hate it. if you're headed to the grave you don't blame the hearse.

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